幽默的英语小故事
英语 故事 是英语教材中提升学生学习兴趣、展现学习要点的重要载体,是英语教学无法绕过的槛。我整理了幽默的英语小故事 ，欢迎阅读!
幽默的英语小故事篇一
名声与艰苦劳动
During the Gulf War，my sister，Jane，bought a flag and asked her apartment's maintenance man, a Vietnam vet，to install a pole for him. When she offered to pay him,he told her there was no way he could take money for putting up the American flag.
海湾战争期间，我妹妹珍妮买了一面美国国旗，她请房子的维修工—一位老兵给她竖一根旗杆。当我妹妹为此什给他钱时，他说，他帮助挂美国国旗，无论如何都不该收钱。
Jane contacted her local newspaper，and they published an article about the incident. The next time she encountered the maintenance man, he told her that everyone he knew had read her story and that she had made him a celebrity.Jane jokingly asked for his autograph.
珍妮来到当地报杜，就此事在报上发表了一篇 文章 。当珍妮第二次碰到那位维修工时，他对珍妮说他所认识的人都看了她写的报章，是她使他成为了名人。珍妮开玩笑地说让他给签个名。
"I don't have time,"the man replied. "I'm too busy setting up American flags.”
他回答说:“那我可没时间，挂美国国旗的事忙得我不可开交。”
幽默的英语小故事篇二
独自在家
My wife will go to any extreme to keep people from,knowing she is home alone. One evening when I was working late，my wife heard a knock on the door. She ignosed it,but the knocing continued. Frantic，sloe began to bark,softly at first，then louder and louder. Much to her relief,the knocking soon stopped.
我妻子独自在家时，总是不想让别人知道家里没有其他的人。一天晚上，我工作到很晚。我妻子听到有人敲门，她就没理，但敲门的声音总是不停，慌乱之中，她开始学狗叫。一开始她低声地叫，随后她的叫声越来越大。敲门声很快地停了，她这才松了口气。
The next day the paper boy came to the door to collect."I came by last night,"he told me,"but I left when your wife barked at me!"
第二天，送报的小孩来我家收钱，那小孩告诉我:“我昨晚上就来了，你老婆老冲我学狗叫，我就走了。”
幽默的英语小故事篇三
彼得的长相决定了分数
One semester when my brother, Peter，attended the University of Minnesota in Minneapolis，an art-student friend of his asked if he could paint Peter's portait for a class.assignment. Peter agreed，and the art student painted and submitted the portrait, only to receive a C minus.
我兄弟彼得在明尼阿波利斯的明尼索达大学上学时，有一个学期，他的一位学艺术的朋友问他是否可以用他做 素描 的模特作为课堂作业。彼得同意了。那位艺术生画完了，就把肖像交给了老师。他只得了一个C-.
The art student approached the professor to ask why the grade was so poor. The teacher told him that the proportions in the painting were incorrect.”The head is too big，”the professor explained.”The shoulders are too wide， and the feet are enormous."
那位艺术生找到教授问为什么他的分数这么低。教授告诉他肖像中的比例失调，教授说:“脑袋太大，肩太宽，脚也过于大了。”
The next day,the art student brought Peter to see the professor. He took one Look at my brother."Okay, A minus. "he said.
第二天，那位艺术生带彼得见教授，教授看了我兄弟一眼，并说:“好，可以得A-。”
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英语幽默小故事
He Won Tommy: How is your little brother, Johnny? Johnny: He is ill in bed. He hurt himself. Tommy: That's too bad. How did that happen? Johnny: We played who could lean furthest out of the window, and he won. 他赢了 汤姆：约翰尼，你小弟弟好吗？ 约翰尼：他害病卧床了。 他受了伤。 汤姆：真糟糕，怎么回事儿？ 约翰尼：我们做游戏，看谁能把身子探出窗外最远，他赢了。 I Have His Ear in My Pocket Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked, "What happened?" "A kid bit me," replied Ivan. "Would you recognize him if you saw him again?" asked his mother. "I'd know him any where," said Ivan. "I have his ear in my pocket." 他的耳朵在我衣兜里 伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里。 他妈妈问，“发生了什么事？” “一个男孩咬了我一口，”伊凡说。 “再见到他你能认出来吗？”妈妈问。 “他走到哪里我都能认出他，”伊凡说。 “他的耳朵还在我衣兜里呢。” A Good Boy Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?" "I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered. "You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?" "She is the one who sells the candy." 好孩子 小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。 “昨天给你的钱干什么了？” “我给了一个可怜的老太婆，”他回答说。 “你真是个好孩子，”妈妈骄傲地说。 “再给你两分钱。 可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢？” “她是个卖糖果的。” Drunk One day, a father and his little son were going home. At this age, the boy was interested in all kinds of things and was always asking questions. Now, he asked, "What's the meaning of the word 'Drunk', dad?" "Well, my son," his father replied, "look, there are standing two policemen. If I regard the two policemen as four then I am drunk." "But, dad," the boy said, " there's only ONE policeman!" 醉酒 一天，父亲与小儿子一道回家。 这个孩子正处于那种对什么事都很感兴趣的年龄，老是有提不完的问题。 他向父亲发问道：“爸爸，‘醉’字是什么意思？” “唔，孩子，”父亲回答说，“你瞧那儿站着两个警察。 如果我把他们看成了四个，那么我就算醉了。” “可是，爸爸， ”孩子说，“那儿只有一个警察呀！” Hospitality The hostess apologized to her unexpected guest for serving an apple-pie without any cheese. The little boy of the family left the room quietly for a moment and returned with a piece of cheese which he laid on the guest's plate. The visitor *** iled, put the cheese into his mouth and then said: "You must have better eyes than your mother, sonny. Where did you find the cheese?" "In the rat-trap, sir," replied the boy. 好客 由于客人在吃苹果馅饼时，家里没有奶酪了，于是女主人向大家表示歉意。 这家的小男孩悄悄地离开了屋子。 过了一会儿，他拿着一片奶酪回到房间，把奶酪放在客人的盘子里。 客人微笑着把奶酪放进嘴里说：“孩子，你的眼睛就是比你妈妈的好。 你在哪里找到的奶酪？” “在捕鼠夹上，先生。”那小男孩说。 英语小笑话 上个星期五我穿了一件 Adidas 的衣服去打球, 一个老美看到就笑我说, "Do you know what does it mean? It means All Day I Dream About Sex.我整天都在想著 性, 缩写正好是 Adidas) " 我正惊讶他怎么反应这么快, 联想力这么丰富时,旁边的 一个老美帮我解围, 他说, 有一个很著名的合唱团 Korn, 他们的招牌歌之一就是 A.D.I.D.A.S, (All day I dream about sex)所以呢,这个典故可是很多老美都耳熟 能详的喔! 下次就换你去取笑老美了. A man goes to church and starts talking to God. He says: "God, what is a million dollars to you?" and God says: "A penny", then the man says: "God, what is a million years to you?" and God says: "a second", then the man says: "God, can I have a penny?" and God says "In a second" 一男子进入教堂和上帝对话.他问:"主啊, 一百万美元对你意味着多少?"上帝回答:"一便士."男子又问:"且话偻蚰昴?"上帝说:"一秒钟."最后男子请求道:"上帝,我能得到一便士吗?"上帝回答:"过一秒钟." 1,Two birls Teacher: Here are two birds, one is a swallow, the other is sparrow. Now who can tell us which is which? Student: I cannot point out but I know the answer. Teacher: Please tell us. Student: The swallow is beside the sparrow and the sparrow is beside the swallow. 两只鸟 老师： 这儿有两只鸟，一只是麻雀。 谁能指出哪只是燕子，哪只是麻雀吗？ 学生：我指不出，但我知道答案。 老师：请说说看。 学生：燕子旁边的就是麻雀，麻雀旁边的就是燕子。 2. The Fish Net "Can you tell me what fish is made, Ann?" "A lot of little holes tied together with strings." replied the little girl. 鱼网 "你能告诉我鱼网是什么做的吗，安？" 老师发问道。 "把许多小孔用绳子栓在一起就成了鱼网了。 " 小女孩回答道。 3. The New Teacher Gee es from school on the first of September. "Gee, how did you like your new teacher?" asked his mother. "I didn\'t like her, Mother, because she said that three and three were six and then she said that two and four were six too....." 新老师 9月1日， 乔治放学回到家里。 "乔治，你喜欢你们的新老师吗？" 妈妈问。 "妈妈，我不喜欢，因为她说3加3得6, 可后来又说2加4也得6。 " 4. A physics Examination Once in a physics examination, Nick finished the first question very soon, while his clas *** ates were thinking it hard. The question was: When it thunders why do we see the lighting first, then hear the thunderrolls? Nick\'s answer: Because our eyes are before ears. 一次物理考试 在一次物理考试时，当同学们都还在苦思冥想时，尼克很快就答好了第一个问题。 这个问题是：为什么在打雷时，我们总是先看到闪电后听到雷声？ 尼克的回答是：因为眼睛在前，耳朵在后。 Jim’s History Examination Uncle: How did Jim do in his history examination? Mother: Oh, not at all well, but there, it wasn't his fault. They asked him things that happened before the poor boy was born. 吉姆的历史考试 舅舅：吉姆这孩子历史考得怎么样？ 母亲：唉，糟透了。 可话又说回来，这也不能怪他。 嗨，他们尽问一些这个 可怜的孩子出生前的事儿。 Magic change 神奇变化 Gaga is a little duck. He is *** all, dirty and ugly. His friends don’t like to play with him. One day, Gaga walked behind his friends quietly(静悄悄地).But his friends did not want him. Gaga was very sad and ran to the river and cried loudly(大声地)。 Just then, a big beautiful bird heard(听见)him crying and flew down(飞下来，落下来). She said, “Please don’t cry. Tell me, what do you want? I can help you.” Gaga told the truth(真相). The beautiful bird said, “OK, I can help you to bee a good-looking duck.” Then she took out a blanket and put it on the duck’s body. She said something which the little duck didn’t understand. Then she took away the blanket. There stood (站立)a good-looking duck. Gaga was very happy. He thanked the big bird and quickly went to play with his friends
圣诞节大家会做什么好吃的小点心么?
绿豆饼：把磨好的绿豆用盐调味，加弄碎的猪肉、绿豆芽、蕨菜、切成丝的泡菜煎出来的，做下酒菜不错。可以用鸡肉或火鸡肉代替猪肉。以腌一下的蕨菜、绿豆芽、包心菜切成丝代替。可以搭配在酱油里加肉汤和醋做的酱。
材料：绿豆1杯，白菜泡菜200g，蕨菜100g，猪肉200g，绿豆芽150g，葱2棵，红辣椒2个
猪肉佐料：酱油2大勺，切好的葱1大勺，捣好的蒜1/2大勺，胡椒面1/4小勺，香油 1小勺，芝麻1小勺，食用油1杯
做法：
(1) 把去皮的绿豆泡在凉水里，用手搓去皮，并按绿豆130g:水90cc的比例磨好调味。
(2) 把猪肉磨成肉沫并加佐料。
(3) 把绿豆芽用盐水烫出来，将蕨菜的硬杆切掉。葱切成丝。
(4) 泡菜除水份后切成丝。
(5) 红辣椒去子切圆。
(6) 在平锅里放油，并放一勺磨好的绿豆，再放猪肉、绿豆芽、蕨菜、泡菜、葱，上面放磨好的绿豆翻过来煎。直径越小越好煎。
(7) 蘸醋酱油吃。
制作香蕉饼
准备材料：香蕉、面粉少许、鸡蛋一个、糖少许、盐一点点、 油一小勺（可省）。将香蕉压成泥，和所有材料混合。调成饼糊
平底锅放一点油，将香蕉糊倒进锅里，小火煎
煎香一面后，翻一面继续煎。
OK
英语小短文带中文翻译
英语阅读技能既是重要的语言技能,也是重要的学习技能,是发展其他语言技能的基础和前提。我精心收集了英语小短文带中文翻译，供大家欣赏学习! 英语小短文带中文翻译篇1 Today, when I went home after school, I saw the delicious snack, so I wanted to buy one of the snacks, then I could not find my wallet, I searched it many times, at last, I had to admit that my wallet was lost. I felt so worried, so I turned back to find my wallet, I watched the road carefully, suddenly, a black dog was in front of me, I felt so scared. The hog yelled at me, so I ran, the dog run after me, I run into the shop and got rid of the dog. I have to went home because of it was dark, my mother came out and told me I forget to bring my wallet, how stupid I am. 今天，当我放学回家时，我看到了美味的小吃，因此我想要买一些小吃，然后我找不到钱包，我搜索了很多遍，最后，我不得不承认我的钱包弄丢了。我很着急，所以我返回去找我的钱包，我一路仔细查找，突然，一条黑狗在我前面，我很害怕。那条狗朝着我叫，所以我跑了，狗追赶我，我跑进了一家商店，摆脱了那条狗。由于天色已暗，我不得不回家，我的妈妈出来，告诉我我忘记了拿钱包，我是多么的愚蠢啊。 英语小短文带中文翻译篇2 Today, when I walk on the street after school, I find the street is very clean, it is very different from usual days. I am so curious, so I ask the cleaner, she tells me that many students have behaved, they don’t throw away the rubbish anymore. I think about the education about the environment last week, it works. We should protect the environment. 今天，当我放学回家走在路上的时候，我发现街道很干净，和往日很不一样。我非常好奇，因此问了下清洁工，她告诉我很多学生已经自律了，他们不再随处扔垃圾。我想起了上周关于环境的教育，确实起作用了。我们应该保护环境。 英语小短文带中文翻译篇3 There are four seasons in a year, spring means reborn, the trees become green and the flowers get boom. In the summer, the weather is hot while in the autumn, the weather is cool, the winter means cold. Among the four seasons, I like the winter best, though it is cold, I enjoy the weather. I don’t have to bear the hot weather, when I sleep, the warm makes me feel so comfortable, I have the good sleep. What’s more, I can play the snow, I like to build all kinds of snowmen, I play with my friends, we are enjoying the moment. I like winter so much, it brings me so much happiness. 一年有四个季节，春天意味着重生，树木变得油绿，花儿争相开放。在夏天，天气变得炎热，然而在秋天，天气变得凉爽，冬天意味着冷。在这四个季节当中，我最喜欢冬天，虽然那很冷，我喜欢那样的天气。我不用忍受炎热的天气，当我睡觉的时候，被窝的暖气让我觉得很舒服，我睡得很舒服。而且，我可以拿雪来玩，我喜欢堆各种各样的雪人，我和朋友们一起玩，我们享受着这个时刻。我很喜欢冬天，它给我带来了很多的乐趣。 英语小短文带中文翻译篇4 I am twelve years old now, I study in a middle school, I am not a little girl any more, I know I should learn to grow up, I want to be a good child. First, I need to be considerate for my parents, they care so much for me, all they do is for my better future, so I want to relieve their burden. I will help my mother with her housework, I can wash the plates and clean the floor. When my father goes home after work, I can massage him, so he will be comfortable and relax. Second, I need to study hard, so that my parents will be proud of me. I think I can be a good child. 我现在十二岁了，我在上初中，我已经不是一个小女孩了，我知道我必须学会长大，我想要成为一个好孩子。首先，我需要为父母着想，他们很关心我，所做的一切都是为了我能有一个更好的将来，所以我想要减轻他们的负担。我会帮助妈妈做家务，我可以洗盘子和扫地。当爸爸下班回家了，我可以给他按摩，这样他就会感到舒服和放松。第二，我要努力学习，这样父母就会为我感到骄傲。我觉得我能成为一个好孩子。
英语小短文带翻译简单
英语小短文及翻译如下：短文一：Only when you understand the true meaning of life can you live truly. Bittersweet as life is, it's still wonderful, and it's fascinating even in tragedy. If you're just alive, try harder and try to live wonderfully.短文一翻译：只有在你了解了人生的真谛后，才能真正地生活。虽然人生苦忧参半，但依旧美妙，而且即使在悲剧中也藏着迷人之处。如果你只是活着，那就再努力点吧，试着活得精彩。短文二：I believe there is a person who brings sunshine into your life. That person may have enough to spread around. But if you really have to wait for someone to bring you the sun and give you a good feeling, then you may have to wait a long time.短文二翻译：相信会有一个人把阳光带进你的生活中是可以的。那个人也许会有足够的东西去四处传播。但是,如果你真的要等别人带给你阳光,带给你美好的感受,那你也许要等上很长的时间。
